When I finally go mad, I hope I don’t turn into this: a freaky dude talking to himself on a bicycle.

I’m on my way home when I see this dude on a bike yelling at someone on his mobile about whatever it is that people yell about. Only he doesn’t have a cell phone. When he rides around me I can see there is no cellphone in hand and no headset in either ear. He is just talking at the ghosts.

He sees me, stops his yelling and rides along ahead, looking back. Nervously?

I am dressed as I always am: Docs, black jeans, black Thinkgeek t-shirt — my uniform, such as it is, at the shop. I have my thin litttle sunglasses on. I carry a six-pack at my side in a yellow liquor store bag. I walk with purpose. (I’m hot…I want to get some beer in me).

He takes off in front of me like I’m the devil himself. He begins to frantically pedal away, looking ahead sometimes, but looking mostly at me over his shoulder. Me, I keep walking at the pace I have trained myself to walk on hot days, around 100 metres every minute. Why rush?

Fella doesn’t see the pole for the stop sign at the end of the block.

*Whack*

Now he’s lying on the ground beside his bike. Now this could be interesting. I don’t quicken my pace exactly, but now I am definitely walking toward him, mostly to see if he’s all right. If it’s bad, I’ve got a very powerful piece of life saving technology on me — a cellphone. Well, and I know CPR too, but this guy is nasty looking so I don’t want to go there if at all possible. Duty to fellow man, yes, when icky, hoping not.

I don’t have to do either. He gets up, shakes it off, sees me, gets on his bike and books it around the corner. By the time I get to the corner he’s long gone.

Damn odd. Not my place to question what drugs people are or aren’t on, but riding a bike when you are having an trip or an episode is perhaps not optimal. I never figured I was scary at all, who knows what he saw in me. or around me. or on me. or with me. or behind me. . .

Should I care? Welllll… freaky dude rode away from me. His choice, not mine. I’ll blog it and forget it. Soon I’ll be in my air conditioned cave with a cold beer. And the only freak there will be me.